What Drives Me

I know I should not write this until I pull myself together, however, I do not want to wait to bring this to as many people as possible and raise awareness. I am saddened, no, devastated after reading this article. I follow LGBTQNATION very closely on Facebook, and as a matter of fact, it can be found under my LGBT Blogroll, and when I logged into Facebook today, this is what I found:

http://www.lgbtqnation.com/2012/02/student-jumps-to-his-death-school-officials-say-bullying-wasnt-a-factor-bullshit/

This kind of needless tragedy breaks my heart, upsets me to my core, and is what drives me to work hard and go above and beyond my very best in my studies. Stopping this kind of thing and finding ways not only to reach these young teens and adults, but to provide them safe and dependable support, is my life’s goal. If ever there is a question of what I am studying, what my intentions and goals are, and/or why, read this article and I promise you, you will understand the certainty of my existence on this earth. May God be with this beautiful child’s family, friends, and classmates, and may the bullies that caused it, at the very least—Learn Something! The letter written by Drew’s classmate and friend is very touching and sends a strong message!

I have never asked before, but I am asking you now, please, please reblog this, post it on your Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Digg, or any and all other sites that you may have available to you. Thank you…

 

 

 

 

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39 responses to “What Drives Me

  1. I am utterly heartbroken. I feel achingly for his parents and family. I absolutely beg for the culture to change. When the culture changes, more people turn around and say “That’s not on” (that behaviour).

    God bless you, Drew.

    • I agree. Many “groups” of people have been put through the wringer and I hope this comes to an end, but I also know that it won’t do so on its own. Speaking for myself, I have to step up, raise awareness, and facilitate less harmful and more positive solutions. This is my goal in life. Thank you for your support.

      -Cindy

  2. It BREAKS my HEART to see students end their lives because of bullying. AS a survivor of bullying myself, I have made it my life work to remedy needless suicides and create more loving environments for children, teens and adults. Through awareness and compassion we will address the bullying and champion the tenderhearted. As a kindness advocate and anti-bullying expert I do training workshops and coaching to be a Champion of the Tenderhearted; and, I facilitate and consult learning and work communities on ways to address bullying and promote kindness. I am in the process of writing a couple of books to help children and adults become empowered. To get an idea of what I do and who I am you can go to http://www.heartsthatcare.net Great post! I am happy to see more and more people who are addressing such a serious issue in our world. With blessings of love, Angi

    • Good morning,

      Thank you so much for sharing this! I really had no idea and I am thrilled to hear that you are in the heart of this fight. I am and will continue to do what I can, but I am on my way to doing so much more. My main focus and end goal are to help those in the LGBT community, as being “queer” is becoming the number one reason for being bullied; however, I will, of course, help anyone who is being tortured. Suicide is not the answer and it is my heart’s desire to find helpful and effective solutions to offer that promotes not only living, but Happy living! I believe…it CAN be done!

      I have your site marked on my favorites bar and will check it out at length when time permits.

      -Cindy

  3. Pingback: Bullies ~ Victims Too ? « MysteryCoach

  4. it’s really sad, and this kind of selective heartlessness goes on, and you are doing greatly in spreading awareness about this social ill among our youth. your drive will inspire many others. Cheers!

    • Thank you! I really appreciate your support. I may only be one person, but if I can get one more to act, and they can get another and so on, there just might be a chance to make a difference. I have absolutely nothing to lose in trying.

      -Cindy

  5. Sure, I agree with you. I understand that people pick at others and lash out like this, due to insecurities, life at home, etc., etc., After a while I have no patience with them, people who behave in this manner … I understand it’s learned.

    I view it, perhaps from a close minded perspective, where I look at the things I’ve been through and I don’t act those ways, so why do they. I know everyone is different and handles things differently, but … they know they’re being cruel. That’s what gets me, that’s what I have a problem with. I’m sure with counselling and the like bullies could get the help they need. I haven’t seen anything myself as to the treatment of the bully either.

    What I do know is that I have a strong reaction to these things due to the affect it has on the person they target. It’s unthinkable to me for people to behave this way.

    • I understand your point too. I really am not trying to make excuses for them and it is unthinkable to me as well why they behave the way they do and for a lot of them, they actually get pleasure for hurting others. From what I understand, this is beocming such a serious issue that they are trying to pass laws to make bullying a criminal offense. I think they should and really hope that they do. That way, if there is a problem in the bully’s life, they will have a chance to speak up or pay the consequenses. Maybe more victims will also find the courage to speak up, if they feel safer in doing so, because the bully will not be permitted to retaliate. I don’t know all the answers, but I do know that something has to be done and Now! Thanks for your input. I truly do take it seriously.

      -Cindy

      • I’m having a conversation with a woman who works with wayward boys, she’s a counselor and I just asked her about treatment for bullies 🙂 … ha! Maybe she’ll shed some light on this for us.

        I would really like to know, I’m not good with “not reacting” to a bully even through I have an idea they’ve gone through things themselves which cause them to behave the way they do.

        I mean, we’re not born mean (barring mental issues or whatever) that’s something that’s taught by our environments.

        Well thank you 🙂 for taking me seriously … I appreciate it. I am forever curious about people and the things they do. I’m also curious about how to get people to shift and see things “better”.

        M.C.

        • Hi,

          I would really be interested in what the counselor has to say. I think that because I am studying to become a psychologist, I try to see both sides and remain objective, though it is very hard in this case, as I do get affected by these suicide teens on an emotional level. I find it interesting that you say that we are not born mean, becuase it has been a queston of debate in both psychology and philosophy classes I have taken. I agree though. Evilness is a learned behavior. I am glad that you are passionate and dedicated to those who are victimized. My main goal is to be an mentor and guide too, but I think in order for me to do that well, I do have to understand the other side of things. Thank you for having this ongoing conversation with me. Other people’s perspectives add to my learning experience.

          -Cindy

        • Wow! This and the next comment from you were in my spam. Good thing I look each one of those over before deleting. Yes, an excellent idea, indeed! And thank you! Every tidbit we write will add to more people’s awareness. I will be right over to give it a read.

          -Cindy

        • I did put it up, I just got in so I’m not sure if you saw it yet. I wasn’t exactly sure what to put so I winged it. I like the idea of raising awareness myself. I spoke specifically about the bully not the victim though because we were talking about that here. Hope that’s okay and we can always change it too…

        • Hi,

          I did go and read it and you were true to yourself in what you said, so I would never even think of having you change it. Unfortunately, I was called away and never did respond, but I will add it to my list of things to do this week. Thank you for the connection.

          -Cindy

        • Lol I have a dry/erase board right in front of me above my desk, so writing the reminder down on it is how I mark it. The bright colored markers make it hard to forget. It really keeps me on track with my school wrok, so I have now divided it into two sections, one for school and one for blog stuff! Pretty cool, huh?

        • I put little sticky’s along the bottom of my computer screen for the more important things, like apts., and stuff. Then I have a planner here too. Color is a very good idea, I do that too. Yes! It is cool!

  6. This world is a sad place Cindy, where we have much learning to do about Love and caring.. So many things break my own heart that go on in this mixed up world.. Where Possessions are put before People. And where we put labels upon others.. Laughing and ridiculing wounding with words that can cut deeper than any knife..
    Working with adults with learning difficulties for the last 9 yrs, I have seen many who shun, mock and move to the other side of the street to avoid those who do not seem as perfect as they think they are.. These people have much to learn.. I came by your site through this post through a Reblog. Wishing you well in all you do… Keep sending your love out all adds to that healing pool of light ..

    Sue~Dreamwalker

    • I am seeing this, but do not understand why it is. We will just have to keep an eye on it and if th problem continues, I will contact the help staff. I would hate to miss any of your posts or you miss mine. I will keep watching and let you know if something changes. By the way, you are very welcome for the nomination!

      -Cindy

  7. Its ridiculous. I’m going to be short on words here, but I have a lesbian sister who has suffered throughout her life. She is one of the most sensitive, giving, reliable people I have ever known. She has been ridiculed for many things, including her sexual orientation.

    What makes it difficult is to recognize that once I was one of those bullies. I was one of those who propped myself up through insulting others. I can’t tell you why, but this post just hit me somewhere deep.

    • First of all, let me say thank you for reblogging and for posting to your twitter! I would like to say something aobut bullying that I should have written in my post. It is not always about being hurtful to others. Though this is not new information, so many do not think about or take into consideration what is going on with the individual who is doing the bullying. Please know, I am in no way excusing the harsh behavior of these bullies, but in a lot of cases, they are being bulllied at home. They are behaving in accordance with the example that is being set for them or they are lashing out in order to hide their own pain. Sometimes they need just as much help and guidance as the victims of their behavior. There is a lot more going on than meets the eye. Having an assembly to make it clear that bullying is taken seriously and will not be tolerated is not enough. They need to take time to ask why the bullying is happening in the first place. This kind of behavior is NOT innate. It is a learned behavior and it is a cry for help. Again, thank you for your help and support. And if your sister needs a supportive friend, feel free to have her contact me here and I will give her my cell number and email address.

      -Cindy

      • I agree on all counts… I get angry when people are mean to one another for their differences. Just because I’m not going to do it doesn’t mean I have to be cruel. You do your thing, I’ll do mine … respect me and I’ll respect you.

        This is awful…

        • You are right. This really is awful and I see posts like this all the time. I know I cannot change the world, but I hope someday, I can change the thinking patterns of enough people to make a difference and save lives. Thank you for reading and for your comment!

          -Cindy

      • I have a question for you, if I may … I have, I can’t say it’s a wrong reaction, I can say that I find it difficult to work with the bully themselves as you referenced I believe.

        I’m more oriented towards helping the victim, get it out of their heads and heal more … so, how do you deal with those who are bullies themselves to get them to recognize how their behavior needs to change?

        I would assume they have to want to change of course…

        • Hi,

          Yes, of course you may ask. I do not mind at all. To reiterate what I wrote in a previous comment, –Please know, I am in no way excusing the harsh behavior of these bullies, but in a lot of cases, they are being bullied at home. They are behaving in accordance with the example that is being set for them or they are lashing out in order to hide their own pain. Sometimes they need just as much help and guidance as the victims of their behavior. There is a lot more going on than meets the eye. Having an assembly to make it clear that bullying is taken seriously and will not be tolerated is not enough. They need to take time to ask why the bullying is happening in the first place. This kind of behavior is NOT innate. It is a learned behavior and it is a cry for help.– Granted this does not help the victims feel better or lessen the affects of being bullied, and it is not the case with all bullies. This is just something I have come to believe from research I did years ago, however, to be honest with you, I cannot find anything current that supports this. I am glad you asked this question, as I will have to find time to look into this further. Thank you.

          -Cindy

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